LOVE ON DELIVERY


Capricorn

Scorpio

Tom was making a good living as a motor mechanic but he, as Capricorn does, wanted more money and more status, so he decided to study law.

His wife Susie liked the idea of “My husband, the lawyer”. But while he studied she must pay the bills, and that was a recipe for conflict. And she had that Scorpio talent for sarcasm that splinters the heart.

Tom, stung by her unkindness, got an evening job delivering pizzas to supplement their income. 

Was Susie happy? “I’m embarrassed seeing you in that silly uniform.” So they quarrelled and finally broke up. “End of story!” Susie said.

It wasn’t the end, though. Tom was handsome, other women saw him in his uniform, looking cute. 

Sales of pizzas soared, so did Tom’s reputation. Susie heard about this and was determined to let him know she had a new lover. 

She phoned out for two pizzas, her favourite classic pizza and a more lavish job with loads of extras. She answered the door, looking glamorous but with the rumpled air of someone who’s been kissed.

This went on, every Friday, the pizzas got bigger and more lavish. “This guy sure has a big, sexy appetite,” said the cook.

Week seven, she cracked. Took the pizzas into the kitchen and sobbed. Not just because she hated hurting Tom, but because she could not face another weekend working her way through that extra pizza. There was no one else, for her there would only ever be Tom.

Then she noticed, one of the boxes felt light. Inside nothing but a note: “Pizza imaginara for the mystery man, made with thin air …”

Laughing, crying, furious, as the bell range, she ran to the door. “How did you know?” she asked.

“You couldn’t love a man who had apricots on his pizza …” As she went into his arms, she murmured: “I don’t want to kiss you. I want to give you a pizza my mind.”